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Speaking as a male, I can't think of anything that remotely equals the thrill of an orgasm. What's weird is that, for all the attention it receives, the male orgasm doesn't get talked about in much detail despite the fact that there can be a huge difference in intensity from one to the next. My guess is that the most women don't know this. With this information gap in mind, I set out to discover what, exactly, makes for the most bone-rattling, foundation-shaking male orgasms, and what women can do to encourage their arrival. I went straight to the experts - a few sex therapists , lots of men. It was as if they the guys, at least were just waiting for someone to ask.

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By reining in their passion, many men deprive themselves of the sexual abandon that produces the strongest orgasms. The solution? Give your man the night off.

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Encourage him to focus on enjoying himself without worrying about taking care of you. There are two basic ways to go about this. One is to tell him, as your lovemaking heats up, that you want this one to be all for him, that tonight he should do whatever makes him feel good.

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The other is to encourage him to lie back passively and let himself be pleasured by you. Sex therapists say this is a better method, because it enables him to concentrate completely on what he's feeling, rather than on what he's doing. The same should go for you when he returns the favor another night: Ideally, both of you will regularly take turns teaching the other delightful lessons in the art of orgasmic appreciation.

One caution: Michael Seiler, Ph. Don't be surprised, then, if it takes a while before your husband is comfortable turning the reins completely over to you. Be patient, but be firm. He'll learn to love it. Ask any man after a week on the road - abstinence is the world's most powerful aphrodisiac.

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Even when he's not out of town, you can contribute to that pent-up, dying-to-make-love state of mind by deploying some sexual teasing tactics during the day. Robert Birch, Ph. The same drive that makes a man an animal when he gets home from a road trip is at work within each individual bout of lovemaking. Uri Peles, M. The more pressure, the more pleasure in the release, because the contractions tend either to be stronger or last longer.

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In our heart of hearts, we men know that the longer the foreplaythe stronger the orgasm, for ourselves as well as for our partners. But at the same time, we have this incredibly powerful drive to simply come, come, come! We can't help it: It's been hardwired into our sexual circuitry over thousands of years. The trick for you is to help your husband set aside this evolutionary imperative so that sex lasts long enough for a truly eventful climax to build.

Linda De Villers, Ph. Other delaying tactics can be brought into play as the festivities progress.

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Stopping for an occasional cooling-off period works beautifully, but takes discipline. The woman-on-top position is useful because it helps the man restrain his urge to start thrusting.

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A prolonging method that may take practice is called the "squeeze technique. You can then start your mutual ascent to the mountaintop again. A corollary of the quickie concept is the sneak attack: An element of sexual surprise can produce a powerful climax. Sometimes you need to cut through all the chaos and clutter of modern life. Anything from job pressure to money woes to kid problems to bedroom boredom can come between you and your man's deepest passions.

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Spontaneity can help bring him to his senses. A good time to try this is on a weekend morning. That's usually when men are most relaxed and their testosterone levels are at their peak. It's not really politically correct to admit this, but the truth is that when orgasm is imminent, there's only one male erogenous zone, and you know where it is.

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It makes sense, therefore, that when men are out for the most lustful orgasms, their positions of choice tend to be those that provide the most direct penile stimulation, and the best opportunities for penile thrust. I also love it when my wife is on top, holding herself up, especially when she does that backward. Carl also mentions another favorite form of penile stimulation: the vaginal squeeze of a woman who's been doing her Kegel exercises.

Kegels strengthen the PC muscle, the one you clench when you want to shut off your flow of urine. Arousal is a mysterious and powerful thing, and sometimes the frenzied abandon of a quick and lustful coupling can produce a climax that's every bit as explosive as a marathon session in the sack.

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I suspect this has something to do with that centuries-old sexual circuitry we mentioned: Sex without ceremony can tap into deep reservoirs of animal instinct. I personally had one of my strongest orgasms when my wife overpowered me as I innocently came home from work one night - pieces of clothing were scattered between the front door and the bedroom.

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I'm sure the fact that she was the instigator added fuel to the fire. As concentrated as we men are on our penises, there are other strategic spots that, when stimulated, can send us careening over the edge. Some men say that having their testicles stroked as they come heightens the sensation. Having the scrotum rubbed feels great. Richard, 49, a writer and editor, loves it when his wife rubs his nipples; Carl recalls a girlfriend who greedily sucked his fingers.

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If he's comfortable with anal play, a prostate massage can result in an extra intense, prolonged orgasm. To find his, slowly insert a well-lubed finger about one inch into his anus, then move your digit in a "come here" motion. There are parts all over a guy's body that might stimulate him and drive him crazy - and they may be less obvious than the aforementioned places. Have you given any consideration to his torso, temples, or chest?

Well, you should. Another special spot? The sensitive space between his balls and butt.

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No matter the positioning, reach an arm around or through to gently place a finger tip or even knuckle on the area, taking care to see how he reacts to see if that pressure is right. Yep - they can make male orgasms stronger too. And they've also been shown to significantly improve erectile function in men who deal with ED.

Have you considered all the sexy things you can say to a man? Spoiler alert: The dirtier, the better. Don't underestimate the power your words can have during foreplay, leading up to something even more explosive for him. The male orgasm consists of two stages.

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In stage 1, the sperm is drawn up from the testicles and pooled with ejaculatory fluids in a sort of staging area just below the prostate gland. Masters and Johnson called this the point of "ejaculatory inevitability," meaning that the man's mother, his priest, and his former girlfriend could walk in the room, and his orgasm would continue as if nothing had happened.

Stage 2, which kicks in seconds later, is ejaculation. If possible, avoid interrupting your man's concentration as the stages unfold. Using techniques that both of you know and like is fine, but unexpected, dramatic maneuvers at the point of orgasm are more likely to distract than accentuate.

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